Hey, it's not cancer.

This past weekend, a fellow cancer mommy and I (with handlers in tow) booked it eastbound to the nearest beach. We packed lightly and drank heavily. Kind of like college, except more awesome because when you are away, you absolutely appreciate the reprieve from trips to urgent care and early morning wake-up calls courtesy of the short ones who follow us around.

We ain't got no innocence.

Hell, we can't even think of a word that rhymes.

As many of you know, I'm a big believer in not following any trends until they are about five years gone. Which makes it the perfect time for Matt and I to start watching LOST from the beginning.

Sweeping Booty

I couldn't have told you that Eve ever realized she was bald a few months ago. But, I found this under a couch cushion:

Benadryl there, done that.

I've been under the mistaken impression that kindergarten was supposed to tire out my daughter. You can probably guess who it has been tiring out instead.

Danime

I swear I don't have Munchausen's by proxy; my kids just need frequent visits to the doctor.

At Daniel's 4-year checkup, he couldn't see the stereo images during his eye exam. When the pediatrician looked at Dan's eyes, he couldn't be sure that both eyes were focusing on the same point.

If a picture is worth a thousand words...

...then this post is worth about 21,000.

You've seen the Before I got the chemo-cut pictures. You've seen the Last 24 hours of having two kidneys pictures. You've seen the I'm a super-badass with one kidney! pictures.

The thing about cancer is...

It blows. Seriously. It sucks, like no other.

There are those who will say, "Well, if you're going to get cancer, Wilms is the one to get." That's like saying, "Well, if you have to get a limb amputated, the left arm is the one to lose."