Monday, June 14, 2010

Normalcy for Dummies

Thursday night kicked off "let's get really excited for kindergarten" week. Matt and I went to the parent orientation at Natalie's soon-to-be elementary school and listened as the staff answered questions to a room full of Nervous Nellies. A few of which mistakenly showed up at the kindergarten orientation instead of their kids' Mensa meeting. ("But just HOW are you going to challenge my child once he's bored with chapter books and kindergarten math? What do you mean, you can't teach them the next grade level up?? My child is obviously much smarter than these other people's kids!")

Friday was kindergarten preview day at the school. Natalie got to go in and see a kindergarten classroom and meet the two teachers on her track. I suppose I was a bit awestruck, because I was being THAT mom who wasn't paying too much attention to her child, only coming out of my daydream to hear one of the teachers firmly reminding Natalie not to play with the magnifying glass because it's fragile. Twice.

Saturday was a kindergarten playdate at the school playground. It was Africa hot. I survived, but not before sweating off a few pounds. Complaining? No. But what's the point in having your jeans feeling looser when you can't peel them off since you are soaking wet?

When I returned with Natalie, my mom whisked me away for a whole day out. Of whatever I wanted to do. No return time set. So, of course, I ate a lot of food (to compensate for my sweat lodge weight loss). It was so bizarre to be out without these little extra appendages attached to my limbs, begging for snacks or toys.

Sunday, I decided it would be an excellent idea to take Natalie, Daniel, and Eve to the store. 'Excellent' in this case meaning, I'm lucky I wasn't so distracted by these little lunatics that I remembered to put on my pants. It was only as I got out of the car and looked down to hold Eve's hand that I realized I was wearing two different shoes. Oh well, it was only Walmart. Not like I was going into Target or anything. But the sad reality is that I generally don't get out to shop at places that don't also sell groceries.

Matt and I ended the day at the pool, our first visit this summer. Of course, we had waited a while so Eve's blood counts would be high enough to fight off anything that might be lurking in the water (like the Incredible Hulk...of poo). I think chlorine gives people a false sense of security. And I know I've only seen one person in our neighborhood actually use the shower at the pool, although it was after he had been swimming and he had also brought soap and shampoo. Nothing like watching your neighbor scrub his pits while trying to eat a picnic at the pool.

Eve screamed with joy, "My baby suit is all wet! I wuv the swimmy pool!" And she wouldn't take off her life-jacket that we use on the kids for the big pool, even though she wanted to stay in the baby pool. So, I can give a pass to the man who couldn't see Eve's pink tutu'd swimsuit under her orange and blue life vest for asking, "How old is he?" It almost makes me want to go get her ears pierced.

Today, we went back to the pool. Once again, entirely too hot but I would rather have them running around like chimpanzees there than in my living room. Natalie later went to a camp called Safety Town in which she learned that if a stranger touches her, she is to scream and kick and kick and run. "I get to kick someone!" Strangers, beware. No touching the Natalie. I am going to be extra vigilant the next time one of these old people at the grocery store pats her on the head- I don't want her to break someone's hip in self-defense.

A few minutes after she got home from Safety Town, it was off to Vacation Bible School for her and Daniel. Which Daniel had been excited about all day long. He got inside the church, saw me get ready to leave, and had a break down. Now, if it were the 1950s, I think someone might have suggested a transorbital lobotomy. However, being 2010, I caved and let him come back home with us. But tomorrow I am leaving him. He's going to have fun, dammit.

So, life is getting back to normal. Scans on Friday. I'm sure more people will ask what my son's name is. ("It's Eve.") I guess this is as normal as it gets. It's not that the world that turned upside-down will ever go right-side-up again; we've just learned to live with the blood rushing to our heads.


  1. Glad to hear things are getting back to normal ? Don't you know we lose a piece of our brian every time we have a kid ?? At least that's my excuse !!

  2. natalie can come to my place and break all the hips she wants:) There is even a baby pool for Eve and her tutu. Daniel can sleep and cuddle with bacon. I think he might like that!